It’s time to clear the air and clarify a few things.
All the way back in 2011, I wrote an article titled “You’re here, you’re queer, now shut the hell up“. Over the years and still to this day I’ve received a lot of criticism for this article from people assuming that it’s a homophobic smear job and that I’m some kind of homophobic asshole who’s against gay rights.
Most of these people didn’t bother to actually read the article properly, instead cherry picking their favorite parts and using them to get outraged that I would dare to criticize anyone who’s not a straight white Republican male. One guy, a Mr. Sam “Ruggy” Burnstead, took particular offense to the article and sent me an entire email accusing me of not only being homophobic, but also of being a Maddox knock-off and a bigoted cousin-molesting redneck. Thankfully, after some discussion, Ruggy saw his error and (kind of) apologized for misreading the article. He even sent me another email ten years later to take back his accusation of me being a Maddox knock-off, admitting that I’ve officially beat Maddox and taken the crown as the king of internet ranting. I wish more people were as kind and respectful as you, Ruggy. AJnet is sending you a fruit basket and a £50 gift certificate for Piper Farms.
Since reading comprehension apparently isn’t taught in schools anymore and Gen Z doesn’t seem to get sarcasm, I’m going to make this article as straight (pun not intended until after I realized what I wrote) and to the point as possible.
I have absolutely nothing against gay people, and I have absolutely no problem with gay marriage. Gay rights are human rights.
Was that clear and concise enough for you morons?
I was amazed at how much negative backlash people gave me over that article. I told a group of gay people to shut the fuck up, therefore I was homophobic. Never mind the fact that I literally say this in the third paragraph:
Seriously, who gives a fuck if two gay people get married? What’s the big deal? Oh wait, that’s right, it violates the sanctity of marriage. Unlike all the 20-year old couples that marry on a whim after being together for a year, have two or three kids, then get divorced two years later after one partner catches the other being unfaithful despite the fact that they were unfaithful too. Premature and unfaithful marriages? No big deal. Two queers getting married? Hell no, we need some government regulation up in this bitch!
I thought my sarcasm was pretty obvious there, but I guess it wasn’t. I guess I need to outright explain what the article was about.
The point I was trying to make with the article was that gay pride parades do more harm than good for gay rights. Nobody is going to take your cause seriously when you’re dressed like a sailor in booty shorts or dancing around with body paint and angel wings. Also, you’re complaining that religious people wrongly paint you as sexual deviants, yet you’re dancing around on a parade float going down a public street wearing nothing but a thong. You’re claiming that you want equality, yet there you are doing everything in your power to differentiate yourselves from the average person.
I’m not alone on this one, and it has nothing to do with me being straight. I’ve met many gay people who feel the same way, that gay pride parades make gay people look like a bunch of degenerates. I know not all gay people are like the ones in the parades. Unfortunately, the average gay person isn’t the one being shown on TV, it’s the guys in booty shorts and angel wings covered in glitter and dry humping each other on a parade float that Joe Public sees when he turns the TV on and gets told (usually by a rich straight white person) that he needs to support gay rights.
The more “in-your-face” someone gets with their message, the less likely most people are to want to accept it. If someone is repeatedly trying to cram religion down our throat we tell them to knock it off. If someone keeps pushing a political candidate at us, we have no problem telling them to STFU. Why should we give someone a pass on being pushy just because they’re gay?
That was the ultimate point of the article, that I was tired of having the gay rights issue constantly crammed down my throat by over-the-top flamboyant guys in body paint and booty shorts and fat ugly women with neon hair. Yet, time and time again, I found (and still find) myself having to defend myself from baseless accusations from foaming at the mouth retards who lack basic reading comprehension and common sense.
I literally don’t care if two gay people I don’t know get married, the same way I don’t care if two straight people I don’t know get married. Two consenting adults getting married is causing nobody any harm. And don’t give me that “affront to God” bullshit either. With all the evil that goes on in the world, if God’s biggest problem is gay marriage then God can fuck right off. I guess this would make me a supporter of gay marriage, but I don’t like to call myself that because I honestly don’t support or condemn it. To me, gay marriage is just marriage. You’re asking me if I support the right of two consenting adults to express their love for each other in the form of a marital ceremony? Yes, I do. It doesn’t matter to me if it’s a man and a woman, two men, or two women.
My philosophy on “gay rights” is the same. Gay rights are just human rights with an extra label. Is someone getting persecuted for being gay? That’s a violation of their human rights, and is morally abhorrent. The same way that persecuting someone based on their religion, race, or gender is a morally abhorrent violation of human rights. I wish we’d stop trying to differentiate between things like race, religion, sexuality, and gender when it comes to human rights. This is only dividing us further and, ironically enough, making it easier to persecute people. We need to treat any persecution of someone based on race, religion, sexuality, whatever, as a violation of their human rights. After all, are we not all human? Bringing all persecuted people together under the same umbrella would go a long way towards promoting actual change and unity, and it sends the message that, as human beings, we’re all in this together.
So no, I’m not homophobic. I just see gay people the same way I see anyone else. Gay people are still people, and people can be good or bad and do right or wrong. Nobody should be immune from criticism just because of their sexuality, that would be discrimination.
You know, the thing we’re all supposed to be fighting against?