“You’ll own nothing and be happy”? Sorry World Economic Forum, AJnet don’t roll that way.

Back in 2016, while Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton were shitting up our airwaves with their obscene political campaigns, a Danish woman named Ida Auken wrote a piece for the World Economic Forum, titled “Welcome to 2030. I own nothing, have no privacy, and life has never been better”. This essay, later retitled to “Here’s how life could change in my city by the year 2030”, was written as the account of some random person’s life in an unnamed city in the year 2030. This person didn’t own a car, a house, clothes, or anything, and instead relied on share services for everything. You can read the whole thing here. It’s honestly pretty damn dystopian and should set off alarm bells for any sane and rational person.

On the surface, this essay was meant to promote the concept of using share services and leasing stuff over ownership. In theory, this isn’t necessarily a bad idea and can be cost-effective for the average person if implemented correctly. For example, Adobe went from charging users thousands of dollars to buy Photoshop and their other products to a monthly subscription system, charging users about $55 a month to use all of their products (Photoshop, Illustrator, Premier, etc). In this case, a subscription makes more sense and saves the user thousands of dollars. This might be the one time that Adobe did something right.

Unfortunately, the idea of having people lease every aspect of their lives is fucking terrible, and would almost certainly be implemented poorly to maximize profits. Leasing is great for software, but not having the option to own property, a vehicle, or anything else (seriously lady, clothing?!) is terrifying and would just be abused to high hell. When I buy something I own it. Nobody can come and revoke my access to it, and if someone tries to illegally take it from me I can use force to repel them. If companies lease out every single aspect of our lives to us, we’re at their mercy. Especially if you have no privacy.

Imagine driving down the street in a new Chevy that you leased and someone cuts you off. You honk your horn and call them a “faggot”. Is the person actually gay? Who knows, who cares, you’re pissed and you used the first insult that came to your head. Great, except your car listens to everything you say, and you just used a homophobic slur. Little did you know, that, buried in the 500 page terms of service, was a stipulation that you aren’t allowed to use “hate speech” while driving that vehicle. Immediately the AI software embedded in the car cuts your engine and revokes your ability to drive the vehicle. Further, you’re banned from ever driving another Chevy vehicle.

Think it can’t happen? Think again, it already has. In June of 2023, a man was locked out of his “smart home” by Amazon because a driver mistakenly accused him of being racist. The entire thing was a misunderstanding and the guy got back into his house after a week, but it highlights a very pertinent issue: Why the fuck is Amazon allowed to lock you out of your home on a whim? Why did they have to lock him out before they even completed their investigation of the driver’s claims? Why wasn’t the guy notified that he had been reported? Amazon was basically the judge, jury, and executioner here without even giving the guy a trial. Suddenly giving these companies all that power doesn’t seem so great, does it? If I got denied entry to my house for a week over a misheard doorbell somebody’s getting assaulted and Amazon is getting sued. It’s my house, you have no right to revoke my access to it no matter what kind of person I may be, especially not without due process.

But assholes like Klaus Schwab and his World Economic Forum are pushing for this corporate dystopia, where large companies own and lease out everything, you the citizen are under 24/7 surveillance, and anyone who attempts to deviate from the agenda is excommunicated. But hey, at least we’ll have reduced carbon emissions, right? Because we very well can’t reduce carbon emissions and develop clean energy without creating a technocratic dystopian dictatorship, now can we?

This whole thing sounds silly, of course. No reasonable and rational-thinking person could actually believe in such a thing, right?

Does this look like a reasonable and rational man:

Now the actual explanation for this get-up was that Klaus was giving a speech at a university in Lithuania (Kaunas University of Technology to be exact), and that was what the speakers were supposed to wear. I’m not sure who thought this choice of wardrobe was a good idea, but it’s still fucking creepy and makes Klaus look like a moonbat cult leader. Even if this wardrobe choice wasn’t his, who could ever take this guy seriously enough to follow his lead on the important issues facing humanity?

Apparently half the fucking leaders of the world. Even Vladimir Putin joined the fun in this interestingly worded speech to the WEF in 2021. Nothing suspicious about that speech, nope. The World Economic Forum allegedly severed their ties with Putin and Russia after the invasion of Ukraine kicked off, but who knows what the hell is actually going on anymore. I used to think a lot of these conspiracy theorists were crazy, but now I’m not so sure.

Klaus and these other assholes keep calling for us to restrict ourselves and give up our rights in the name of climate change, meanwhile they’re flying around in private jets and individually leaving behind carbon footprints that the average person couldn’t leave behind in several lifetimes. These are the people who will own everything that us peasants will be expected to lease. And, gosh darn it, we’ll be happy! The rich get richer and the poor get poorer.

Fuck that, I don’t know about you guys (and girls, we don’t discriminate here at AJnet), I’m not playing that shit.

I’ve already touched on a way to fight back, by pirating their propaganda and taking money away from them. Guess what? This can be taken to the next level quite easily. You want us to eat bug-protein meat substitute while you rich assholes dine on real meat? You have supply lines, don’t forget that. Think it’s terribly hard to knock over a truck and loot it? It’s not. What are you gonna do, transport all meat with armed guards? Similar strategies can be employed on other “luxuries”. Your supply lines are very vulnerable and very easy to rob, idiots. You’d do well to remember that. Highwaymen can make a comeback. I’ll own nothing and be happy? No, World Economic Forum, I’ll fucking steal everything and I’ll be happy.

The king of hyperbole has spoken, now give me my damn crown and fuck off with your “You’ll own nothing and be happy” bullshit.

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By Angry_Jerk

The CEO/Editor-in-chief of AJnet, and the current king of internet ranting. Hailing from the fine village of Northeast Philadelphia, AJ has been creating content on the internet for over 15 years. None of it has really been funny or entertaining, but he keeps trying anyway. When he’s not creating new articles for the site, he can be found hitting the weights, watching anime, or playing retro video games.