Harold Camping is a fucking idiot

Angry_Jerk May 16, 2011 0Comments

“No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.”

Matthew 24:36

“Harold Camping is fucking stupid.”

Angry_Jerk 5:16

Looks like someone didn’t get the memo.

According to evangelist Harold Camping, the Rapture is set to occur on May 21, 2011, with Judgement Day being five months later on October 21. That’s right folks, in less than a week we’re all going to be fucked to Hell (or rather non-existence) while these self-righteous tools are lifted into Heaven to serve their God for all eternity. The plantation’s gonna burn, and the master only has room in the house for 2% of his slaves. Only the most loyal and hard-working slaves will be rewarded with salvation, while us rebellious slaves will be left to perish.

I’m not taking issue with people having their own religious beliefs, even if I may find those beliefs to be complete and utter bullshit. Freedom of religion is a basic and inalienable human right. What I DO take issue with are assholes like Harold Camping who prey on those that they perceive to be weak and sheepish. Camping is taking advantage of the fears of religious people, and using it to build a following to make himself appear like some sort of a prophet and boost his own ego. Put simply, he has a Messiah Complex, and every person who chooses to follow him is feeding it. If you’re one of the many people who actually abandoned their entire lives to join Harold Camping’s Caravan of Idiocy, I hope this article will serve as a wake-up call and encourage you to rethink your actions. Hope for you is not lost, since you obviously have some doubts if you were able to seek out this site.

Hilariously enough, the best way to dispel this guy’s claims is with the same Bible he grotesquely misinterprets.

1. Even Jesus doesn’t know when the end is. (Matthew 24:36)

In case you’re fucking blind and somehow missed the first line of text at the beginning of this article, the Bible says that no one, not even Jesus Christ himself, knows the time that the Rapture and Judgement Day will occur. Camping attempts to rebut this using another Biblical quote:

He said to them: “It is not for you to know the times or dates the Father has set by his own authority. But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.”

Acts 1:7-8

This is stated by Jesus to a group of personally hand-picked apostles, in reference to Jesus’s return.

Firstly, Camping has very loosely (and in my opinion, very poorly) interpreted this passage. Nowhere does it imply that the apostles will be made aware of the date. In fact, Jesus pretty clearly states the exact opposite. While it says that they will receive “power”, this “power” isn’t outright specified. My interpretation would be that “[receiving] power” refers to becoming emboldened to preach that Christ will return at an undisclosed point in time.

Second, even if the “power” the apostles received did refer to knowledge of the date of the Rapture, the passage only refers to the apostles that were present, and not anyone else after them. Unless Harold Camping has invented time travel (and if he has he’d better watch out because I’m going to jack him for his time machine), he is not one of those apostles.

Seeing as even Christ himself doesn’t know the exact date, this means that Camping is trying to exalt himself above Christ, one of the things that the Antichrist is supposed to do. Which leads me to my next one.

2. Camping completely disregards the Book of Revelation.

The Book of Revelation (arguably the coolest part of the Bible) is meant to depict, among other things, the Rapture, the return of Christ, and Judgement Day.

Whereas Camping says that the timespan between the Rapture and Judgement Day will be five months, the Book of Revelation gives us a period of seven years, complete with tons of awesome stuff in between, like the rise of the Antichrist, wars, plagues, and even an army of 200 million horsemen. This period of time is meant to give those who weren’t taken during the Rapture a chance to redeem themselves in the eyes of God. Christians, who are you going to trust: The Bible, or some guy who cherry-picks stuff from it?

C’mon Harold, how could you miss this?

3. Camping’s reasoning for the date is completely made-up.

In this interview, Camping tells us he reasoning for the date of May 21, 2011:

The number 5, Camping concluded, equals “atonement.” Ten is “completeness.” Seventeen means “heaven.” Camping patiently explained how he reached his conclusion for May 21, 2011.

“Christ hung on the cross April 1, 33 A.D.,” he began. “Now go to April 1 of 2011 A.D., and that’s 1,978 years.”

Camping then multiplied 1,978 by 365.2422 days – the number of days in each solar year, not to be confused with a calendar year.

Next, Camping noted that April 1 to May 21 encompasses 51 days. Add 51 to the sum of previous multiplication total, and it equals 722,500.

Camping realized that (5 x 10 x 17) x (5 x 10 x 17) = 722,500.

Camping has essentially pulled the numbers 5, 10, and 17 out of his ass. On top of that, he gives no reason for deciding to go from April 1 to May 21 to obtain the 51 days he adds to obtain the number 722,500. Nice round number I guess? Who fucking knows?

4. Camping and his followers are all guilty of pride.

By asserting that they are going to be saved, and that they have some kind of information that will save others, they are guilty of one of the greatest sins of all: PRIDE. Pride is the same sin that led to Satan being thrown out of Heaven, so you know God doesn’t take it too lightly. To quote Proverbs 29:23, your arrogance will be your downfall.

Better set your next date a bit further, Harold. Maybe in 2022, when you’ll already be dead of old age and not have to explain yourself to the few people still naïve enough to place their faith in you after May 21 comes to pass.

Wake up people, and stop believing this senile fraud.