Let’s take another dive into the Rantlister Archives for one more interview.
We’ve finally reached the bottom of the barrel, folks. This is the last interview I was able to salvage from the Rantlister Archives.
One of the biggest reasons Rantlister failed in the end wasn’t just because internet ranting was on its death bed, it was also the fact that the people running the show were cursed with busy lives and general apathy towards the project.
I had just returned to Philly after the end of a bad relationship, and whatever time I wasn’t spending rising through the ranks at my supermarket deli job I would spend partying. I didn’t have the time or passion to carry out any of the grand plans I kept making for Rantlister or my own site because I was always working, getting hammered, or chasing some slut (usually a combination of the three). Bob Smash was going through a messy divorce and trying to take care of his daughters. Bagoda was still in college. We all had more important matters to deal with than some website for a dying internet subculture.
Obviously that wasn’t meant to be an accusation or an insult towards Bob and Bagoda, and I think ultimately Rantlister would have still failed anyway even if we didn’t have higher priorities and had given it our all. Like I said, the internet ranting scene was already dying, and content creation in general was making the transition from the gritty and rough underground style of the 00’s/early 10’s to the sanitized corporate-friendly generic style we have today.
Gweem.net was a shining example of that gritty and rough underground style of internet ranting. When I say gritty and rough, I mean a take-no-prisoners no-holds-barred raw and unfiltered approach to ranting. This was before cancel culture had came about, before the entire world had turned into a massive “left vs right” shit show, when the TikTok generation was still wearing diapers and watching Sesame Street (do kids still watch that?). I don’t think this current generation will ever truly understand just how raw and unfiltered the internet of the 00’s/early 10’s really was. Today everyone is very careful to watch what they say, but in the earlier days nobody gave a fuck. Words like “faggot”, “nigger”, “retard”, and virtually every anti-Semitic slur you can think of were thrown around freely. We didn’t give a fuck what anyone else thought, and we wanted the world to know that by being purposely offensive. The younger generation today has little to no concept of anonymity and uses their real name and picture without second thought, but our generation went out of our way to hide our identities. Getting doxxed and having our full names, faces, and addresses plastered around everywhere usually meant trouble. It was a different time, for sure. Was it a better time? I don’t know, there were certain aspects that were, in my opinion, definitely better. Creators certainly had more heart and passion, probably because we did it for fun and not as our main sources of income. But maybe using gratuitous racial slurs is something that’s better off being left in the past. There’s nothing unique or edgy about it anymore, especially given the rise of racial tensions across the globe. I don’t regret my choice to move away from that in my own writing, but I also don’t regret doing it in my early years. I was able to learn from the past and use that to grow as a person and a writer.
I say all of that because this interview with Gweem is without a doubt the most raw and unfiltered interview I’ve posted (the reason I saved it for last). Despite being around for only two years, Gweem’s website perfectly captured the essence of what the rant scene was really about: Raw, unfiltered, unrestrained rage. Gweem truly did not give a fuck about offending anyone, and this interview demonstrates that flawlessly. It also helped that this time around I actually tailored the questions to the interviewee, which created a stellar interview that encompasses the true spirit of what ranting really is. Reading this is like opening a time capsule and peering into the heart and soul of classic internet ranting, and I’m glad that I’m able to preserve it here on my own site. I encourage readers to check out Gweem’s site on the Internet Archive (the links in the interview are updated accordingly) if you want to see internet ranting at its rawest.
This interview was done in March of 2011. Interestingly enough, Gweem’s last article was posted in July of 2010. It was common for ranters to take months between articles, so I guess we didn’t think anything of it. I don’t think Gweem even knew it was his last article, since there was another article title with “Coming soon” written next to it. It never came, and I guess Gweem moved on with his life.
In any case, here’s Rantlister’s interview with Gweem of Gweem.net, originally posted in March of 2011.
This month on Rantlister Interviews, we have Gweem of Gweem.net. If you haven’t read his site yet, do it now.
First things first, what inspired you to start Gweem.net?
Anger. Hatred. The usual.
Actually, the site was originally based off of a word created back in the 80′s by myself and my brother when we were kids. Gweem was the encompassment of all things bad (as the front page’s definition describes). It’s meant to be the ultimate word to call the biggest pieces of shit in your life. In its infancy, the site was basically just a list of everyone I ever met who pissed me off, acted like a fucktard, or just in general were all around piles of pure dogshit to life as we know it. Some….problems…came about from that format, so I simply ranted about that incident, and decided that I’d just make the site about EVERYTHING that pisses me off personally, or just things that I think are awesome in general. Some think it’s a Maddox copycat thing, but he just bitches about random shit. Gweem.net is solely about things that I like or dislike – I don’t feel the need to embellish on random shit just because I need to get off my ass and make more material. I write from the black hole that is my heart…and if that means not making a post for an entire year because I’m not feeling particularly pissed about something…so be it.
So of all of the things that piss you off, what would you say pisses you off the most?
Down’s Syndrome boys…specifically. I hate those fuckers. Less specifically? People…as a whole. When there’s a group of stupid, my rage meter goes through the roof. It’s like stupid is contageous; the more people there are to absorb it, the more stupid there is to be spread. Now, that’s not to say there aren’t plenty of individuals who are more fucking retarded than a legitimate retard – because there are – it’s just harder to manage stupid when it’s coming at you from all angles. Its easier to just say “people” because it’s never just the same person. People move – I move – new jobs, etc. There’s always plenty of fresh annoyances when you have to live among mankind.
Any particularly bad experience with Down Syndrome people that stands out?
All of them…well, with Downy boys, that is. The girls don’t really bother me much (other than the face)…but the Downy boys are fucking assholes. No single encounter has particularly traumatized me into hating them; I’ve never liked those freaks. I even have like a distant 2nd cousin that’s a Downy and I hated that fucker the last time I saw him when I was like 5 years old.
If you’re looking for a story, there’s one that I’ve been asked to tell a few times over by those that have heard them all…I suppose it stands out, but nothing beyond the usual for me with them:
I was in the military, and during technical school, they had a Special Olympics thing going on that I was voluntold to participate in. If you know anything about the military, being voluntold is a common thing – rarely do you want to be a part of any of the utter bullshit public relations crap the leadership wants to force you to participate in so they can get promoted. Anyways, so me and my roommate were forced into this tardolympics shit, and everyone got their assigned retard. The night before you got your tard, they gave you the name and a “special needs” card with their name on it, what events they’ll be doing, and directions on how to cater to their special tard needs. My kid’s name was Forrest, and I SHIT YOU NOT, his events were all running (and one shotput). So, the next morning, the tard busses pull up and we get out tards. You guessed it: I got a fucking Downy. I about lost my shit right there, and the only thing that stopped me was the military punishments that I might have got for choking that fuck.
So, to cut a long long long story short: Forrest was an amazing failure at every event. He lost every single one, and other tards were making fun of him. There was a celebration that afternoon and we abandoned our loser tard and joined up with some other pretty cool tardos that friends were babysitting. Yeah, it’s funny; there are some pretty badass tards out there. Anyways…the meat of this story was in the ONE NIGHT we had to spend with our tards. Yes, they made us bunk with them…
After the tard party, we go back to our room, and my roommate goes to take a shower. MY bed was a separate floor-level bed, and the roommate had the bottom bunk of a 2-bed bunk. So, to be sure that Forrest’s fucking dumb useless ass didn’t hurt himself, I sacrificed my bed and took the top bunk. So, there I am, minding my business on my bunk and I tell Forrest when [roomy] is done, he needs to go take a shower cuz he stinks like tard-sweat. So, tard-fuck proceeds to get balls fucking naked in front me of. I FUCKING FLIPPED! I mean, mind you, this kid is not a kid, he’s like 17 years old…and out of nowhere this dude has is dong and pubes right there out in the open. I literally exclaimed “OH FUCK!” and immediately thre my covers over my head – but this asstard thinks it’s fucking funny. “hee heee heee hee heee hee” just fucking laughing and shit. I’m yelling at him from under my covers, and he goes and jumps on MY bed (not the bunk) and [roomy] comes out from the bathroom and yells “WHAT THE FUCK?” and like an idiot, I peek out, and this Downy fuck is laying spread-eagle on the bed, pulling his legs apart at [roomy]. It was fucking sick!
So, now [roomy] is back in the bathroom yelling through the door, and I’m under my covers yelling; we’re both pissed at this kid–err dude. So, I’m still under the covers and I feel a tapping on the sheets over my face. I’m like “Forrest, what are you doing?!” and he’s all “heeeee heee derrrrr heee hee” – THEN, out of fucking nowhere, the sheets are pulled off of my face and some kind of fabric is being smothered into my face. I have no clue what to do, so I push the fabric out of my face and see Forrest there holding his nasty, sweaty, shit-stained underwear!! And I SHIT YOU NOT, I mean SHIT STAINED! There was a giant brown streak on those Haines!! I was choking back the vomit as my anger level reached maximum. I leaped off the bunk and into Forrest’s faggot tard face. I balled my fist and was about to pulverize this fucker. [Roomy] yelled “Dude, stop! You don’t want to do that! You’ll get fucked!”
At this point, I have my rage face on, and storm out of the room and into the squadron commander’s office (you’re definitely NOT supposed to do this) and demanded they get that fucking tard out of my room. I explained what happened, but of course, the commander wasn’t about to admit he was wrong for housing tard with troops. Anyways, nothing happend to Forrest and I slept elsewhere. I was pretty pissed, and it just added another nail into the nailgun of hatred I have toward those fuckers.
Ex-military? Any other interesting stories from your service?
Nothing I haven’t spilled onto my website that I can think of…
I can tell you that being in the desert sucks, and I have no idea why anyone would want to go there for 6-15 months, let alone want to live there on purpose…but aside from that, the military when you’re not deployed is no different than working for AOL or Hardee’s/Carl’s Jr. People get this idea from movies and TV that it’s so reverent to be in the military and you’re around a bunch of badasses and smart people, when in reality, the military just ends up hiring all of the losers who couldn’t hack it as a tech support for the Geek Squad or wasn’t able to show up on time to flip burgers, or thought they were too thug to hold a job. So, even though you go through a bunch of break-you-and-make-you training, you’re still the same piece of shit you always were…and 6 months after training, you go right back to flipping burgers or doing Geek Squad for Uncle Sam but in a different uniform. And yes, faggots still try to act all thuggish in the military. Tell me the last time you saw a real thug standing at attention and saying yessit all the time…thought so.
I notice on your website that you don’t have any sections for fan mail and hate mail. Do you receive any of either?
All the time. As a matter of fact just last night I got some douch bitching about my bullying article and misinterpreting the whole thing. I just don’t feel like putting up their bullshit publicly is going to do anything for the site. Hatemail and fan mail are just easy material – I don’t like to take the easy way out. I do respond to mail that I find entertaining (good or bad) though. I suppose if I got more than like 1 request for a hatemail page, I might do it…MIGHT…I’m not a big fan of caving in to others’ demands.
Do you read any of the other sites on Rantlister? If so, which ones are your favorites?
I’m not gonna pretend to hate everything…I like stuff. I could just be like “no only my site is the best and nothing else is wirth reading” but that’d be a balls-out lie. I keep it honest regardless of how much I hate shit I post on my site…but I post things I like on my site too. I’m not here to put on a false face or always being angry and bitter.
So, yeah…I’ve looked over the others at one time or another. The only ones I’ve returned to were How To Not Suck and Awesome Behavior. HTNS is actually pretty good; I’ve been there a few times. I also like AB but it can be hard to read so I limit my time there to articles that seem like something that may be worth burning my eyes over, lol. I wouldn’t tell someone how to run their site though. Keep it how you like it, and I will too. I’m not concerned with quantity of visits; if you agree with my shit, you’re probably sensible and might come back in the future. If you think I’m an uncaring prick or some zit-faced queer trying to boast about my virtual penis, whatever. Go away. Didn’t need your traffic anyways. It’s not like I make even a penny off the lame shirts and shit I advertise on every page. The whole thing is for my personal entertainment.
Anyways, I’ve trailed off topic. Yes, I do like a couple other sites.
So for those who haven’t familiarized themselves with your website, what things do you like?
The same things anyone else likes. I have favorite movies, music, games, women and all that shit…I’m still a person.
Above all, I like shit that makes sense…
What are some of your favorite movies, music, games, and women?
I’ll just throw out a few examples since there are too many of all of those.
Movies:
Duel to the Death, Alien 1-4, Robocop, Predator, Friday the 13th series, Boss Nigger, Rambo, pretty much anything with badass guns and 80′s cheesey action…oh and fucking Conan the Barbarian.
Music:
Tool, Nine Inch Nails, Cyndi Lauper (fuck you), October Rust by Type O Negative (only this album by them), and I catch a lot of hell for liking the old pre-1999 ICP shit but I’m not embarassed by it. I’m not a one note kind of guy. I like a little bit of everything…but mainly I’m a hoser for the one-hit wonders from the 60′s to the 80′s.
Games:
Way too many to pick from.
Women:
See above statement, but if I had to pick someone famous; Lucy Liu is hot as fuck.
Imagine you had unconstrained authority over the entire United States. What are some things you would do or change?
To be honest, I wouldn’t want the job. You have to fix the whole world. Fixing the US on it’s own won’t be enough.
I suppose if I had to choose, I’d wipe out all laws and start over from scratch with just the basics from the Constitution and Bill of Rights…maybe a few of the other common sense amendments. Then I’d enact a law that says nobody can make any more knee-jerk laws that protect us from ourselves. I dunno, I know it’s not that simple because there will always be some fuckhead who ruins it for everyone by trying to play the gray areas… I’m just fucking sick of laws protecting us from ourselves and each other. Sure, I’d lose all of my wonderful comforts and they’d be missed, but it’d be worth it to not have to worry about bullshit like “sexual harassment” and percieved “racism” and all of the polically correct bullshit out there. That’s all pipe dreams and speculation. I’m sure even if we wiped all laws, everything would suck still… Shit’s fucked up. I don’t think I’d be the right one to fix the idiocy. I’d proably break the world more…
One realistic thing I’d like to see is to have government become a service similar to the military’s reserves; where you are essentially recruited to serve as governing authority and can return to your normal job after your “tour” is over…limiting the tour would prevent people from staying in office too long and would prevent people from relying on lying to you just to keep their job. IF they knew they has a job waiting for them after their term is over, then you wouldn’t have just a bunch of power-hungry fuck-faces who stay in office forever. And for those who volunteer, they’d have to submit to a polygraph test to make sure they’re not fucking liars.
I don’t know. Again, I hate politics. I don’t claim to have the answers…I just have ideas – probably bad ideas. Let’s not get into politics.
If you had a perfect day, how would it go?
It would be a Saturday that lasted about 8765 hours, and my Blackberry would be broken, my landline would only make outgoing calls, and everyone else would be too busy working to bother me. Oh, and I’d get compensated by my employer for my time off…
Before we wrap this up, any closing comments or other things you might want to say to those reading this?
Uhhhhh….take your vitamins, drink your milk, get exercise and do good in school.