The New World Order: Another perspective

This GIF I found on /x/ is pretty sweet.

As you know, I have expressed belief in a secret cabal of the world’s wealthiest and most powerful people pulling the strings behind the scenes. I use the term “New World Order” mainly for simplicity, and because it sounds way too fucking cool to be forever tainted by faggots like Alex “Butterball” Jones and David “New Age hippy freak who needs to be smacked” Icke. In the article I didn’t really go into too much detail on the New World Order or their intentions, but a few moments of Google research will give you a basic idea so long as you set your brain to filter out the words “Alpha Draconis”, “Reptilian”, “Crystallinks”, and “Godlikeproductions”.

The more thinking I do, the more I suddenly start to see where the New World Order people are coming from, and the more I start to feel that maybe individual liberty isn’t something that the human race is ready for.

I’m not even joking anymore. I’m really starting to question everything I believe in. Maybe the human race NEEDS to be dictated over in order to progress. Maybe the population NEEDS to be culled from behind the scenes. I was browsing 4chan’s /x/ board, and I saw somebody mention that December 21st is the date that the Reptilian aliens will come back and harvest much of the world’s population. I hope to whatever God exists that this is true, and pledge to assist our new Reptilian overlords in rounding up people for the harvest. You shitty fucking human scum, seriously what the fuck is wrong with you all? 200,000 years of evolution and what do you have to show for it besides the ability to reproduce and consume like fucking cancer cells. I hate you all and I can’t wait for the harvest, you’re barely even fit for the serving platter you shitty-

Disregard that.

I’m not a man who takes things at face value, nor am I a man who just blindly accepts what he’s told. That’s why I’m going to do something completely different and actually attempt to justify some of the New World Order’s supposed goals. It’s time to get rational up in this bitch.

If any members of the New World Order are reading this, please let me join your secret club. If the fact that I sympathize with you guys isn’t enough, consider that I have a killer recipe for peppermint bark. Who doesn’t like peppermint bark? Have you ever met someone who said “I don’t like peppermint bark”? Neither have I. Also, ati me peta babka.


1. The New World Order wants to cull the world’s population.

This is it: The Master Plan.

A common gripe is that the New World Order wants to cut the world’s population from its current number down to something drastically smaller. While the exact figure is up for debate, many people like to use the figure on the Georgia Guidestones, which is 500 million.

The world’s population is somewhere around 7 billion, and drastically increasing every year. The greater the population, the greater the strain we put on our resources, like food and water. The greater the population, the more natural land we have to destroy to provide shelter. The greater the population, the greater the amount of conflict, crime, and death. We’re reproducing at a higher rate than we can handle. The obvious solution is to not have so many children, but tell that to those stupid skanks who have like 4 kids in the same age range and a baby belly to boot, or the dumbfucks who refuse to wear a condom because “it feels better without it”. And then people have the gall to get mad at China for suggesting a one-child policy. Because it’s your right to overrun the world with your burdensome little crotchfruit, assholes.

Exactly why is culling the population a bad thing again?

2. The New World Order controls the media and constantly bombards us with depictions of violence and war in order to glamourize it.

What if maybe, just maybe, the intention isn’t to glamourize violence, but to show us by example where it leads? Watching people getting blown up or shot isn’t supposed to incentivize you to go out and blow up or shoot people, you morons. You’re supposed to look at it and say “Damn, this shit is brutal. I’m never going to do these things.”

But you don’t, because you’re too busy being stupid. But I’m sure that’s also the NWO’s fault, right? Tell me, what is it like to be completely blameless?

3. The NWO is suppressing clean-energy alternatives because they would lose money.

What? This is stupid, and so are you for suggesting it.

A lot of alleged NWO members are supposed to be businessmen. From a businessman’s perspective, wouldn’t it be more profitable to dominate the clean-energy market than suppress it? DUHHHHHHHHHH… Didn’t stop to think of this one now did you, asshole? Of course not.

On top of that, many of the “clean-energy alternatives” are either inefficient (wind and solar power), dangerous to the environment (nuclear power), or hella-fucking-expensive (fusion power). Your ideas of electric-powered cars are stupid, because where is that power going to come from? Your ideas of nuclear-powered cars are stupid, because really, you want to give the average idiot access to something as dangerous and unstable as nuclear fission? Your ideas of hemp-powered cars are stupid, because you’re a hippy asshole who needs to put down the bong and come back to the real world.

Wipe the drool up from the floor now, please.

4. The NWO wants to implement a one-world feudalistic government with themselves at the helm.

This actually doesn’t make any sense considering they’re already supposed to be running the show from behind the scenes, but…

Judge these actions not on a recent time scale, but on the entire scale of human history. How often have people been able to govern themselves without eventually giving that right up? Exactly. If there’s one thing that’s evident, it’s that giving humans the right to vote will inevitably lead to them voting their rights away in favor of convenience. That’s why we elect people to speak for us: Because we’re fucking lazy. The large majority of humans need somebody above them constantly reminding them what to do and how to do it. Otherwise we wouldn’t have developed government or laws.

The NWO is well aware of this and wants to just cut the crap and establish the order that you’ve all been asking for ever since you came down from the trees and formed groups. The sooner the human race admits that it needs to be told what to do and how to do it, the sooner we can attempt to move on.

You’re probably questioning whether or not I just came out in support of fascism. Yes, I fucking did. Stop pointing the finger at me like the natural order of things is my fault.

5. The NWO is starting destructive wars from behind the scenes.

This one clearly goes hand-in-hand with their plan to cull the population.

Engineering wars to cull the population is both logically and morally sound. The destruction is wide-spread, and the death affects every race and religion. It’s effective, and the politically-correct crowd can’t complain about discrimination.

On the other hand, I suppose you’d rather they simply destroy all the inferior races and leave the world a white paradise, right you filthy racist?

6. The NWO created a welfare system so people would be dependent on the state.

Another part of the Master Plan.

The NWO is enforcing survival of the fittest. All of these welfare leeches living in excess off of the public dole won’t last a week once the well runs dry. They don’t understand concepts such as bartering, supply and demand, responsibility, or having to work to sustain one’s self. The only two concepts they know are “It’s da first of da month!” and “Yo it’s da first of da month, why ain’t my mothafuckin’ money there?!” Some of these people are so helpless that they’re beyond saving. They exist to breathe, consume, reproduce, and die. That’s it. They hardly ever contribute anything back to society, save for statistics for the yearly crime report. The NWO has lured society’s weak and unjustly burdensome in with the promise of not having to do a damn thing ever again, and they’re going to pull the rug out from under them, as I’ve said in the past they would. The NWO knows that the people who matter can survive without handouts.

I hope all those prime-cut steaks and king crab legs were worthy last meals for you.

A lot of people will whine and complain about how cruel and unfair and evil and immoral this is. It is, if you’re judging these actions on a contemporary basis, and not on a historical one. You see it as “They’re killing innocent people”, but they see it as “We’re ensuring the survival of the human race by taking care of the problem now before it spirals even further out of control.” Thanks to their “cruel” actions, your descendants just might inherit a world that’s more than a giant sprawling urban wasteland crawling with vermin and decay. The ends totally justify the means in this case.

What do you mean you don’t want to be culled? Sorry, but it’s far too late for that. You should have thought about that before boosting the population by 6 billion in one century. That’s right, your reckless reproduction caused the population to increase 700% faster in 100 years than it did for all of human history. That’s fucking ridiculous, and you should all be ashamed of yourselves.

May the return of our Reptilian overlords be swift, vengeful, and without mercy.