My website sucks and I’m a Maddox ripoff, so sayeth Mr. Boyan Sabev.
From: Boyan S. <[email protected]>
Date: 9/12/2010
Subject: your site sucks BIGTIME
Hi,
Your site is very uninteresting and being in the top million isnt really worth anything. Im not the first to say but you are not controversial or original here, i dont see a singal original thought on your site, even the gangsta legal team is an old thing. You try to suck up to maddox, which is patetic enough, but you dont even get maddox. You think pseudo controversial material and “profanity” are going to make you interesting. This isnt even whats interessting about madoxs website, you are a suck up and not even a good one. Try to defend yourself from this one on your shitty website. By the way the word inanity in your slogan is stolen from maddox. I even allow you to post my email, im shure i can handle your mothers hatemails – then ill handle her pussy. Ill make you a little brother whos gonna beat you up but protect your nerd ass from bullies and tell you about girls and stuff. Your no angry jerk. You are a laughable idiot.
bye
Hold on one second here while I use my Cap’n Crunch secret decoder ring to translate your seemingly incomprehensible email.
…
k, so from what I understand Boyan, you seem to think that being in the top million websites on the internet is unimpressive, I try too hard to be edgy, I’m unoriginal, I suck up to Maddox (who also apparently has a patent on the English language), and you have fantasies about impregnating my mother. Interesting, very interesting indeed. Let me ponder this whilst I beat the shit out of babies and old people, then beat my girlfriend for not making me a sandwich.
Firstly, you will be happy to know that my website has not been in the top million websites for about 8 or 9 months now, since the article you’re referencing was written almost a year ago. In fact, it will be exactly a year in three days. My goodness, time does fly! In that time, millions of new websites have sprung into existence, many of which are corporate-sponsored or use keywords to manipulate their rankings. This has (sadly) pushed my ranking all the way back to 4,609,751.
Pressing on, I am most troubled by your accusation that I try too hard to be edgy. No, seriously, what the fuck is up with that shit? Is it really still considered “edgy” to use racial slurs online? Jesus Christ dude, it’s 2010. It should be considered edgy to not use racial slurs online.
Yes, the stuff I write on this website might be considered unoriginal, but you know what’s more unoriginal? The use of the term “unoriginal” as a criticism. Seriously, that’s what 95% of the negative criticisms about sites like mine consist of. “UR SO UNORIGINAL.” “SO-AND-SO ALREADY WROTE ABOUT THAT.” “UR COPYING OFF OF MADDOX.” Because Maddox was the first person ever in the history of the entire fucking world to convey negative opinions of the mainstream through writing.
But of all the criticisms I’ve ever received, “You try to suck up to Maddox” has got to be the most confounding one. When have I sucked up to Maddox? I’ve ripped on him several times. Unless of course you’re referencing how I pulled the leaked episodes of his show after he politely emailed me and requested it? Yeah, I guess this could be considered “sucking up” to him:
Subject: Please remove leaked videos.
I’m not sure how you got them, but I’d appreciate it if you removed them and didn’t share or repost them. They aren’t mean to be released, and were only shot as a proof of concept. I will be releasing actual videos soon, and Youtube will remove these videos anyway if I ask them to, but I figured I’d rather go to the source and ask you to please remove them yourself. I know you don’t have to, but I have no beef with you, and I’m not sure why you have it out for me, but I’d be grateful if you did. Please let me know, thanks.
Well, I honestly didn’t expect to receive a humbling letter from the man himself. If I decided not to pull them, I really don’t think there’s much you could do. But I’m not a dickhead, and I know you aren’t really one either. I’ll pull them.
On a side note, I don’t think the videos were terrible. They weren’t great, and they were better suited as articles, but they could have been far worse.
ONLY because you asked nicely, and ONLY because your site was one of the inspirations that drove me to do mine.
Yeah, you’re right, there’s not much I could have done. I appreciate you being cool about it.
Thanks for the feedback too, I appreciate it. I’d be interested to hear what you think once I get the new cuts up as well.
Thanks again.
I’m such a fucking suck-up, being receptive to courtesy and responding in kind, as well as offering honest criticisms. Either that or I’m simply not a complete and total douchebag. And LOL @ the idea that I ripped Maddox off by simply using the word “inanity” in my slogan. Honestly, this website’s slogan is probably the most accurate description of this website (The site’s slogan in 2010 was “Profanity, Inanity, Insanity” ~Editor).
It is my regret to inform you that my mother, at the age of 57, is no longer capable of bearing children. But by all means, please don’t hesitate to have sex with her anyway. Just be prepared though, since she’s prone to flipping out over utter bullshit (I think volatility must run in the family).
Now you’ll have something new to read when you check my website daily, Boyan.