Ways To Be A Dickhead To Your Wife

1. Try and control every aspect of her life.

2. Tell her she can't leave the house unless you go too.

3. When she does manage to get out without you, call her every five minutes and ask her where she's at.

4. When you come home from work and find she's out, go out looking for her and "surprise" her.

5. Tell her she's not allowed to open up her own business, especially if it involves her working with some 20 year old guy who actually treats her like she's worth a damn.

6. Threaten to leave her if she still insists on doing it.

7. Try to guilt her by invoking your dead parents.

8. Scream at her in front of your daughter, even if she's only 10.

9. Tell her to instead get a job at some lame ass deli slicing lunchmeat.

10. Make it clear that if she does go through with her plan to open up her own business, she will have to suffer your incessant complaining and bitching for months to come.

11. Take days off work so you can keep an eye on her while telling her that you're doing it so you can spend time with her, even if you can't afford it.

12. Question her nonstop about everything she does.

13. Answer her cellphone.

14. Dismiss any and every idea she may have. So what if the idea may bring in money?

15. Act less like her husband and more like her father.