Frequently Asked Questions

While I don't generally receive a lot of detailed emails from readers (they exist, I swear it!), I do receive many similar comments and questions from people at forums I hang out at or that I personally show the site to. I also assume that my readers have some of the same questions, but are too lazy to send me an email addressing them. I will update this as needed.

 

"Were you serious about what you said in (article)?"

Maybe, maybe not. If you can't figure it out on your own that's your problem.

 

"Can I post a link to your site on my own?"

I was surprised to learn that there are still people who get pissed at the idea of someone linking them without asking permission first. Are you guys fucking serious? Hotlinking images is one thing, but to get pissed off that someone thought your site was cool enough to share is absurd. Of course anyone may link to my website without asking. However, if you're going to plagiarize my work with the intent of personal gain, I can't be held responsible if your website/email address/bank account gets broken into with the intent of causing you ruination. I also can't be held responsible if you receive an influx of junk mail at your home or work addressed to "Tyrone Niggerdick", or if you are bombarded with calls from telemarketers asking for the same person.

 

"What's your beef with Prison Planet? You seem to agree with most of what they say, so why do you dislike them?"

Alex Jones (the owner) is nothing more than a fear monger, and I also suspect he might have ties to intelligence organizations. I admit I read the site daily for its purveyance of stories that the mainstream media ignores or doesn't give enough attention to. However, the articles written by its staff are biased and poorly-sourced. It's also very fun to rile up the average "Truthseeker" and watch them try to prove my obvious bullshit wrong with loosely-interpreted quotes made by prominent members of society.

 

"What's with the bird in your logos?"

It's a phoenix, a mythological creature which goes up in flames and is reborn from its own ashes. No, I'm not some kind of basement-dwelling nerd who likes wizards and shit. I just like the bird.

 

"Are you a devil-worshipper?"

No. I don't believe in worshipping anything or anyone, regardless of whether or not they exist. If the story of Satan rebelling against God is true, then Satan is only worthy of respect. A supreme being who has the power to make things better but chooses not to is not worthy of respect let alone pledging undying servitude to. I'm a free man and I will do as I please.

 

"Do you idolize Hitler?"

Only for his excellent speaking skills, his adherence to his principles regardless of what others felt, and the massive impact he had on mankind's history.

 

"Is Señor Juan a real person?"

Yes and no. Juan is a friend of mine from Philadelphia who emigrated to America from Mexico the legal way. His English isn't poor, but I still like to chide him about his ethnicity. The head I crudely Photoshop into pictures involving him is really him, and it's his least favorite picture of himself. The video on my YouTube account is of some random guy I recorded at some shitty concert in a park with the intent of using him to rip on Juan. Yes, the "TROLLED!" posting was him, yes, he made that one Flash movie, but no, he's not actively involved with this website. Yet.

 

"Where do you stand on the political spectrum?"

If I absolutely have to lump myself in with a bunch of morons, I would say I'm more Conservative than anything. In my own words, I'm pro-Constitution. I support the basic rights entitled to us, but I am against going to war unless we are attacked first or there is an obviously imminent threat.

 

"What's your obsession with Grace Slick?"

I think a more fitting question is, what kind of faggot could possibly not find this woman hot:

Yeah she's in her late 60's now, but that's why I'm building a time machine.

 

"Why don't you post fanmail/hatemail on your site?"

Because 95% of both fanmail and hatemail I receive are less than 3 sentences long and consist of the same things. The average fanmail:

"Your site rocks! Keep up the good work!"

The average hatemail:

"UR FAT AND STOOPID SUCK MY DICK FAT ASS"

I have received longer fanmails, but not enough to warrant a page for them. Maybe if people got off their lazy asses and sent me something longer than 2 sentences, I'd consider posting it.

 

"Maddox wannabe, blah blah blah."

Eat a dick.

 

© AngryJerk.net 2007-2010